"Grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference."
My friend and I were talking the other day about protecting your core. Our "core" being the most intrinsic, genuine, loving part of ourselves.
I'm sure anyone reading this has encountered people at some point who projected/directed their negativity, anger, and bitterness onto them. I sure have. It's really difficult in those moments not to react emotionally. It's hard to accept that we cannot manage people and their emotional responses, only our own (and that's difficult enough to do as is). When people do things that are emotionally violating or disrespect our character, we have options of how to react, including: 1) We can let it go, 2) We can safely confront them, or 3) We can emotionally react.
Personally, I have come to the conclusion that my first emotional response is usually not the one to listen to. Emotions are valid and come from somewhere very real within us; that doesn't always mean they reflect to situation accurately. A lot of time, our first emotional response is in fear, not coming from a place of love. If someone insults me, my first reaction may be to take it personally, or even be judgmental back. Both of these reactions are coming from "I feel rejected, therefore ____." When in reality, someone insulting me most likely reflects their negative image of themselves on some level.
If I can take a moment to reason with logic before reacting, I can then consider the next best move. If it's someone I am close to, I will most likely have a conversation about my feelings, realizing that I own my feelings, they are not anyone else's responsibility, and work together to create healthy boundaries for both parties. If I don't really know the person, I have the option to just realize they have their own inner battle they're struggling with and take what they say with a grain of salt. I always think, if you can maintain who you are through stressful circumstances (as hard as it may be), you are maintaining your core and will be happier with yourself later- which is much more important than getting even or being spiteful.
These are just my two cents on the subject, as it is something I have had to think of recently. I would be interested to hear your thoughts on how to react in stressful situations! Let me know in the comments, or email me at: firstname.lastname@example.org
- xo, Brittany
Daily Dad Joke #9:
I told my friend I wanted to be a flamingo for Halloween! She said I should change my costume.
I had to put my foot down.... *buh dum tisssss*